Not a Journal. Not a Diary. Rather... a funny, humorous, upbeat account of an extraordinary life.

Just so you know, these columns are based on my life. But. Keep in mind that I don't walk around with a tape recorder, unless there is something particularly awful going on that needs recording. Otherwise, columns are written soon after they happen.

Oh. Sure. I do add a bit of make up here and there to protect the identities and wrong doings of my friends. (ha) Columns are mostly cleared with the people I write about before they are published, to be sure that we all agree that they are as close to real as possible, without insulting anyone... um... except me. I'm able to insult myself all I want. Yes. I'm used to the abuse.

Many fans e-mail me to ask if the people in my columns are real. Um. Yes. My friends are unbearingly real. My family is painfully real. I know. If they were made up they would all have magical powers and castles overlooking long rivers and they would always have pudding on hand in case I came to visit.

Many people ask if Ralph is real. Um. Yes he is. Sorry. How could someone that completely gorgeous be made up? And his daughter is real as well. Sarah and I need each other to lean on when it comes to understanding her French father. Recently he was suggesting that I drop my laptop off at home before I met him for lunch. He meant to say, "Drop it." Instead he said, "Drop dead."

Hey. That's what friends are for.